GK: Our program comes to you today from (MUSIC) Good old St. Paul. People often ask, what is the difference between Minneapolis and St. Paul, and of course there are good people wherever you go, but---- in Minneapolis, people are very much up on the latest. They are into whatever is hip. In St. Paul, we're into hip replacements. People in Minneapolis spend $4 for a bottle of artisan soda (FIZZ). They buy European jeans. In St. Paul, we don't pee in our jeans. The new TV series My Alleged Birth Mother --- everybody in Minneapolis is watching it because they read that it's cool ----
SS: Who are you?
FN (MOM): Oh Jessica. Please.
SS: Get out of my life.
FN (MOM): But I'm your mother.
SS: I don't need a mother.
FN (MOM): Please.
SS: You're a smotherer, that's what you are.
GK: In St. Paul, we have yet to hear about this show. We're still watching reruns of The Honeymooners.
TR (JACKIE): One more word out of you, Alice, and POW, right in the kisser.
SS: Oh Ralphie.
GK: Minneapolis is people in black, St. Paul is people in plaids. In Minneapolis, more people own ferrets than cats -- -- in St. Paul (DOG PANTING), you guessed it.
Wonderful people in Minneapolis, don't get me wrong, educated, interested in the arts, big readers, gracious hosts-- -- ----
TR: This is a 1967 Armagnac. Very spirited-- long velvety finish and there's a big blossom of flavor when you burp.
GK: In St. Paul, we just drink beverages, we don't talk about them.
(POP TOP CAN)
FN: Hey. TR: Okay.
GK: St. Paul people go over to Minneapolis all the time, to catch up on the latest movies, the latest fashions, the hot new restaurants. People from Minneapolis never come to St. Paul. Never. The eastbound lane on I 94 --hardly any traffic.
SS: I went there once and it took me two hours to find my way home.
GK: We're okay being from St. Paul, we just want people to know we exist. It's not the Minneapolis airport, it's the Minneapolis-St. Paul International airport. Minneapolis is what makes it international, but we're part of it too.
HT:
The Twin Cities: a Cultural Feast And we're the one to the east.