(PIANO)
GK: September. It's beautiful but it's also the time when desperate mosquitos come after you (MOSQUITO BUZZ). You represent their last chance survival to them. It's your blood that will see them through these chilly nighs. (MOSQUITO DIVE BOMBERS) ---- Mosquitos are nothing to mess with. They may carry a virus that causes memory loss (FN: Causes what?), disorientation (SFX) and dementia (BABBLE). You can buy an electric bug zapper
(ZAPPING). You can have a crop-duster come over (SMALL PLANE APPROACHING, LOW) and spray your place with chemicals (PLANE PASSES) that will make your voice higher (FN MIDGET VOICE: Sure got rid of the skeeters.), you can pour gasoline (POURING) all over your patio and light it (BIG POOF).
Or you can use duct tape. Yes, when you wrap duct-tape around yourself sticky-side out, you have protection against bugs that never stops. Some bugs stick to it and other bugs see that and go away. Mosquitoes (SFX) but also hornets (HORNET BUZZ) and deer flies (FLY BUZZ).
A message from the American Duct Tape Council. Duct tape, it's almost all you need sometimes. (DUCKS)