GK: Remember back when you were in college and parties were just a whole lot of fun? (HEARTY LAUGHTER, GLASS BREAKAGE, SCREAMS OF LAUGHTER) And then you got older (TOLLING BELL) and bought a house and some people from work came over (MURUR OF VOICES, LOW, QUIET) and you talked about work and it was no fun. What went wrong?
FN: So this is my Manhattan. See I've crushed the blood orange peel and the bitters is made from a kim chi reduction and the bourbon is a single-mash from a distillery that only makes 100 barrels a year, and I toss in a dash of cayenne. And I shake it (SFX COCKTAIL SHAKER) And here's your glass, chilled ---- (POURING) go ahead. Try it.
TR (SIPS, THEN SPITS)
FN: What's wrong?
TR: That's not a Manhattan. That's not even a Schenectady. Tastes like paint thinner.
(SFX FOOTSTEPS)
FN: Boy, you just wasted a great drink.
TR: I brought my own bourbon.
FN: What's that?
TR FRENCH
FN: French bourbon? What is this? A joke?
SS: No fighting, please. We're friends, remember?
FN: Friends with this jerkwad??? No way.
TR: You pompous idiot---- (A FULL SCALE FISTFIGHT WITH DOG BARKS)
SS: Oh, Jack - please-What's wrong with us? Why can't we just be happy the way we used to be? (SOBS)
GK: What happened is they got too much money and they bought expensive liquor and they got competitive ---- Back in the day, they drank the same cheap brew, no recipes, no mixing.
(POP TOP CAN, BEER POURING INTO GLASS)
FN: And he says, "What kind of cheese is that?" So the guy says, "it's nacho cheese!"
(SFX BIG LAUGH ALL)
TR: You and Sharon sure are a hoot.
SS: What do you say we all go bowling this weekend? Double date?
FN: Sounds good to me! (MUSIC)
GK: Cocktails divide us but with Beer: We're all friends.
FN: (SINGS)
Put away the whiskey!
Put away the wine!
Open up a beer,
Let's have a good time.