(PIANO INTRO, TRAFFIC SOUNDS)

GK: When people walk by a snowman such as myself, they tend not to make eye contact and who can blame them? I am just a pile of round chunks of snow sort of iced over with two buttons for eyes and a tennis ball for a nose and I'm sort of expressionless, but it doesn't mean I don't feel things. I sense what people are thinking sometimes as they walk past me.

(FOOTSTEPS, WITH SOME URGENCY)

TR: I've got to pee SO BAD. Why didn't I go when I was at Jennifer's house? Aiyiyi. (FADES AWAY)

GK: It's this odd thing about water, which is what I am, mostly, same as humans ----- the thing about water is that it picks up vibrations, senses energy-- and so everytime someone passes me ----- I feel something.

(FOOTSTEPS IN SNOW, PASSING)

TR (INTERIOR): Tonight's the night!!! Oh boy oh boy oh boy.

SS (INTERIOR): What am I doing with this jerk? Why can't I dump him?

TR (SINGS TO HIMSELF): Oh yeah. I can tell. She wants me. Oh yeah!

SS: What if I just run as fast as I can---

(FOOTSTEPS)

GK: When my head was knocked off a couple weeks ago, I got a look at the sky and the ground and when they put it back on the wrong way, I saw across the street, but otherwise I look at that green wooden house where a man lives who sometimes stands in his front window and plays an air guitar and sings----

PD: (W ELECTRIC GUITAR, SINGS)
I see the bad moon arising.
I see trouble on the way.
I see earthquakes and lightnin'.
I see bad times today.

Don't go around tonight,
Well, it's bound to take your life,
There's a bad moon on the rise.

SS (OFF): Honey, what are you doing??

PD: Nothing----

SS (OFF): Are you okay??

PD: Just fine-------(SINGS, SOFTLY) There's a bad moon on the rise.

SS (OFF): What???

PD: Nothing.

GK: I don't know if they're happy or not. Hard to tell. My best friend these days is a spruce tree lying on the ground by the curb. She used to stand in their front window, with colored lights all over her, and now she's dying.

SS (TREE): I don't know what the lights were about. Seemed to make them happy. Didn't do much for me. Made me dry and feverish. Now I guess I'm waiting for someone to haul me away. Not much of a life.

GK: Well, at least we can talk.

SS (TREE): Talk about what?? We will never know any more than we know right now, which is dirt. That's it.

GK: Don't be so down all the time.

SS (TREE): I AM down. Look at me. I would give anything for water. I wish you'd melt a little.

GK: And not far away is another snow person who I can barely see who somebody put a big hat on and ever since she's been singing-----

HM (SINGS): (LA SNOWMAN)
Para bailar la snowman,
Para bailar la snowman,
Arriba y arriba
Y arriba y arriba, por ti sere,

Snowman, snowman, snowman, snowman
Snowman, snowman
Snowman.

GK: You singing to me????

HM: AT LAST YOU NOTICED!!!!

GK: What's on your hat?

HM: BANANAS! ORANGES! FLOWERS!

GK: Real ones??

HM: REAL TO ME!!! YOU SHOULD GET A HAT!!! IT CHANGES EVERYTHING!!! I USED TO BE SAD LIKE YOU AND NOW I'M A SINGER!!!
(HM SINGS)
I may be made of snow
But I can shake my hips, you know.
Shake it once and shake it twice.
Hey baby, come and melt my ice.
(SHE VOCALIZES, FADING)

GK: The other day the mailman came by with a long box which he opened and showed to me.

TR (SID): Hey. You ever see flowers? Probably not. --- Nice, huh. ---- Guy in that house ordered them for his wife after she got so mad at him. She was gonna throw him out. So----- flowers are cheaper than a hotel room. Right? Okay. You take care now. See you tomorrow.

(FOOTSTEPS AWAY)

GK: Tomorrow. I don't think about it. Here they come---- haven't seen them for awhile.

(FOOTSTEPS IN SNOW AND STOP)

SS: Thank you for a wonderful evening, Brian.

TR: Did you enjoy it?

SS: I did.

TR: Did you really?

SS: Of course. Why do you always ask me that?

TR: I never knew anyone who enjoyed being with me before.

SS: Well, I do. I hope we can do it again soon.

TR: How about tomorrow night?

SS: I'd like that.

TR: Are you sure?

SS: Of course I'm sure.

TR I mean, if you change your mind, you can just text me and let me know. And it doesn't have to be, like, a date or anything, we can just hang out.

SS: I want to date you, Brian. And there's one more thing.

TR: What?

SS: I want you to kiss me.

TR: Now? Really?

SS: Yes, now.

TR: Here? But what if people see us?

SS: I don't care.

TR: I don't know about this.

SS: Come here.

GK: And she pulled him close to her and she put her face right up to his and they touched and I felt very strong remarkable feelings right then. I felt light coming out of the top of my head. I'm snow and yet I trembled.

HM: ALL YOU NEED IS A HAT!!!! (SHE SINGS)
Arriba y arriba
Y arriba y arriba, por ti sere,

HM & GK:
Snowman, snowman, snowman, snowman
Snowman, snowman
Snowman. (AND A CHORD)