GK: Do you find yourself browsing aimlessly through the Yellow Pages? Watching Congressional hearings on TV and taking notes? Do you find yourself clipping articles out of the newspaper and putting them into manila folders that you stick in between books on the kitchen counter, intending to do something with them eventually, and never do? If you do, you may be suffering from Attention Surplus Disorder, or ASD ---- the ability to sustain focused attention on things that are basically not that interesting. If so, you're probably not getting enough coffee. Coffee! It's the American elixir that keeps your attention span under 10 seconds so you can drive to work while you're on your cellphone and doing your lipstick.
TR (FAST, HIGH): Gimme a triple espresso, no milk, with an extra shot.
SS (FAST, HIGH): Triple espresso with an extra shot, any syrup with that?
TR (FAST, HIGH): No thanks.
SS (FAST, HIGH): No milk with that?
TR (FAST, HIGH): No milk. (CELLPHONE RING) Excuse me. (VERY FAST HIGH TALK) (ESPRESSO SFX) (MUSIC, SINGLE NOTE, ACCEL)
GK: Why waste time sleeping when you can power through with a cup of joe?
SS (SLEEPY): Honey-are you still on E-bay? Why don't you come to bed-it's past 3 o'clock.
TR (FAST, HIGH): Guess what? I think I just bought a car.
GK: Coffee. It makes you productive and alert, and raises your heart rate so you don't have to work out. You've got e-mail piling up, books to skim, errands to run, people to see, deadlines to meet, channels to surf, microwave burritos to heat up--don't fall behind. Have some coffee.
SD:
Coffee --- I adore it----
I would like to drink a quar't
Of coffee.
It's delicious all alone, it's
Also good with doughnuts.
Black coffee.
Coffee gets me going faster
So I'm not put out to pasture,
Keeps me competing and succeeding
And awake at boring meetings
Have a pot of it today,
I'm sure you'll say it's awfully good coffee. (BIG BUTTON)