(GK: Garrison Keillor; SS: Sue Scott; TR: Tim Russell; FN: Fred Newman)
GK: It's the season of the garage sale. Useful items at bargain prices, like this clarinet here (BENT CLARINET) ---- get that fixed, it'd play just fine ---- or this old Victrola (VICTROLA), clean that up it'd be worth plenty ---- and how about this ukelele (UKE), it comes with an instruction booklet. And how about this electric card shuffler (SFX). That'd make a nice gift for somebody. Or these parakeets (SFX).
It's the season of the lawn mower (SFX), and afterward you doze off in the hammock (SNORING) and you dream that you're in the boat (HORN) and you're fishing for giant gator gars (CAST & SPLASH) but instead you pull in a young woman named Wanda (FN SOUTHERN: Hi. Thank you so much. Would you have some articles of clothing I could borrow?) and then you're awakened by the sound of your car starting. (CAR STARTING, REV)It's your sixteen year old son. (FN: Hey! Wait a minute!) Why is he wearing those dark glasses? (CAR REV, SCREECH OF BRAKES IN REVERSE OUT DRIVEWAY. STOP. ENGINE REV, AND SCREECH AS IT PULLS AWAY. SCREECH OF CORNERING)
© Garrison Keillor 2003