(GK: Garrison Keillor; PD: Pat Donohue; RD: Rich Dworsky; FN:Fred Newman)
GK: As you know, this is Listener Supported Radio, and your membership contributions are what keep us on the air, and to show our gratitude, we want to send you our Radio Remote with Fast Forward button ---- when you come to something you don't care for, just skip ahead. A song, for example.
PD: I've got the blues----(FN FAST FORWARD, THEN SLOW AND STOP) --.I've got those blues.
GK: Different people like different things. Some people love it when we make fun of the President, but if you don't-----
TR (BUSH): Let me just say this about that colonoscopy I had ---- boy (FN FAST FORWARD) but it all came out okay in the end.
GK: Just skip over it with our Fast Forward Remote. Most people love Rich Dworsky's piano pieces, but if you don't----
(RD: PIANO SOLO OPEN (TK FAST FORWARD EFFECT) PIANO SOLO CLOSE.
GK: The News from Lake Wobegon itself. --..It's been a quiet week in Lake Wobegon (FN FAST FORWARD, THEN SLOWS TO) ----and all the children are above average. ----- It's the only Fast Forward in radio today, our gift to you to show our appreciation for your support. Here's how you get your Radio Remote with Fast Forward, just send your name and address and proof of listenership to Box (FN PICKS UP FAST FORWARD AND SLOWS) 544. That address once again is (FN PICKS UP FAST FORWARD AND SLOWS) 544.
© Garrison Keillor 2003