(GK: Garrison Keillor; SS: Sue Scott; TR: Tim Russell; TK: Tom Keith)

GK: And now this word from our sponsor. (new AGE PIANO)

TR: I feel really good in the morning since I changed my breakfast cereal to Narco Bran Breakfast Flakes. It contains a powerful muscle relaxant that puts me in a warm happy mood sort of like a feather floating in the breeze. It really makes mornings pleasant. And the kids like it too.

SS:(KID) I'm too happy to go to school, Dad. Can I stay home?

TR: Sure. Why not? Narco Bran Flakes contain enough prescription strength muscle relaxant to turn your central nervous system into a soft warm pudding.

SS: (WIFE) Honey, you've been reading the front page for half an hour now. What's so fascinating?

TR: I have no idea.

SS: (LAUGHING) Oops! I just chewed through my lip.

TR: Narco Bran flakes. Suddenly I feel, really, really, good.

GK: Not to be eaten within six hours of operating a motor vehicle. (MUSIC BUTTON)

© Garrison Keillor 2002