(GK: Garrison Keillor; FN: Fred Newman; SS: Sue Scott: TR: Tim Russell)
GK: ... next time you go to the big city, for protection, wear the City Slicker......from Peninsula Clothes. It's heavy. (STRAIN) It repels snow (BLIZZARD), sleet (LIGHTNING), rain (THUNDER), garbage thrown from windows (SQUISH, SQUOSH), spilled coffee (SPLASH), taxis racing through puddles (SPEEDING CAR, SPRAY OF WATER), insults (TR: Hey fish face!), anything the city can dish out rolls right off you.
SS: Your business proposal is weak in all the critical areas, your writing style is abysmal, your lovemaking left me utterly unsatisfied, and that tie you're wearing looks like you bought it at a yard sale.
TR: I'm impervious, Miss LaMont. Utterly impervious.
SS: On the other hand, that's a great looking coat.
TR: Thanks, City Slicker!
(MUSIC)
GK: When you go to New York, protect yourself. With the City Slicker. Available in Soot Grey. Bilge Beige. Manure Mauve. And Icky Ecru. (SPEEDING CAR, SPRAY OF WATER)
© Garrison Keillor 2002