(GK: Garrison Keillor; TK: Tom Keith; SS: Sue Scott: TR: Tim Russell)
GK: As many of you may know, I recently underwent open heart surgery. Nothing dramatic like a bypass. Just a valve job. My mitral valve just wasn't doing its job. They could have replaced it with a pig valve or one of those bionic numbers, but with my health care plan doctors decided to use duct tape.
And I feel great. I'm jogging now. Downhill but it's jogging. I have the stamina of a 16 year old; when I sit and watch television I get up and go into the kitchen for potato chips and Coke.
Life is better, whites are whiter. Thanks to duct tape. It's just what the doctor ordered.......remember: all solutions are short term, even heart surgery, so there's no point in paying for copper or brass when duct tape can do the job.
(DUCKS) A message from the American Duct Tape Council.
© Dan Fiorella 2001