(GK: Garrison Keillor, SS: Sue Scott, TK: Tom Keith, TR: Tim Russell)
.....we'll be right back after a message from the National Rifle Association.
TR: This is Charlton Heston. Over the past twenty years or so, hard-line Stalinists, posing as concerned mothers, have tried to pass a lot of rigid idiotic rules about gun ownership in order to leave Americans helpless to defend their rights. The N.R.A. has fought for the right to own and carry firearms and also to twirl them or hold them in your lap and caress them, just like I'm doing with Old Betsy here. Let me ask you this: why is the Constitution of the United States not applicable aboard aircraft? Do we give up our right to worship as we please when we board a flight? Do we surrender our right to speak freely? Then why does the Second Amendment not apply past the jetway? If every American who loves freedom would stop as you go through security and say, "I may or may not be carrying a firearm," we could bring jet travel to a halt and bring this country to its senses. Support the Second Amendment on the ground and in the air. Together, you and I and Old Betsy here can get this great nation out of the hands of creeps and into the hands of rugged good-looking guys like you and me. Thank you. (GUN BLAST)
....the preceding was brought to you by the National Rifle Association and may or may not reflect the views of this radio station.
(c) 2000 by Garrison Keillor