GK: brought to you by Bertha's Kitty Boutique....
Summer can be a trying time for cats, when the humidity rises and the temperature creeps up to 80, 90 --- there they are in the hair suit (MEOW) --- and of course you leave the door open to the basement and you leave a bowl of fresh water and yet --- it seems as if there's more you could do ---- (CAT AFFIRM) --- maybe a serving of Bertha's Frozen Tuna on a Stick (CAT AFFIRM) --- Cat Camp in the Adirondacks (MEOW) --- where your cat can learn diving (BOING, MEOW, SPLASH) and cat crafts such as paw painting (CAT INTENT SQUISHES) and think of how much better your cat will be able to control mice once it learns archery (MEOW, SNAP, ARROW FLIGHT, BOING, SQEAK). But until cat camp comes around, I think Puff needs a shave and a haircut. (CAT CONCERN). Yes, if your cat is troubled with excess hair, ask for Bertha's Dipilatory Cream for Cats --- rub in D. C. at night (CREAM SQUISHES) and in the morning, you have a hairless cat (CAT ALARM, SHAME) --- And if your cat is self-conscious about nudity, (CAT SHIVERING) a pair of Cat Pants from Bertha's can make a big difference. (CAT QUESTION) -- if you need to go, just raise your right paw (CAT OK) Bertha's Kitty Boutique.
© 1997 by Garrison Keillor