GK:...brought to you by Fred Farrell Animal Calls. (MONKEY, JUNGLE BIRDS) Test the difference for yourself. Here's the sound of an actual walrus. (WALRUS) And here's the sound of a Fred Farrell walrus call. (WALRUS)
TR: This is Fred Farrell. If you're troubled by deer coming in your yard with napkins tied around their necks eating the tulips off your front porch, time to order one of my Fred Farrell wolf calls. (WOLF HOWL WITH REVERB) Deer are a nuisance. You let em eat the tulips, next thing, they'll be asking to use the telephone ---- but not with my set of wolf calls, each with its own distinct message instantly understandable to deer: (WOLF CALL NO. 1) I am a carnivore, (WOLF CALL NO. 2) so are the other three who are here with me, (WOLF CALL NO. 3) it doesn't matter if you stand still, I know you are not a lawn ornament. Fred Farrell Calls are realistic ---- and they're inexpensive: for the money you'd expect to pay for just two animal calls, you can purchase my Fred Farrell Six-in-One call --- with anaconda (SFX), anchovy (SFX), anthropoid (APE SFX), anteater (SFX), antelope (SFX) and Aunt Lois (SFX).
GK: Fred Farrell, the name to trust when it comes to animal calls. (MONKEY AND JUNGLE CRIES)
©1996 by Garrison Keillor